10 BASIC TIPS FOR MAKING SURE YOUR GAME NEVER SEES THE LIGHT OF DAY, ESPECIALLY IF IT'S YOUR FIRST GAME.

The purpose of this post is to share some useful advice with the game developers community. It is basically a number of tips for making sure your game never sees the light of day, especially if it's your first game.

Many beginner mistakes, including some of the committed during the development of Flat Kingdom, are likely to arise during various processes of creating the game , however it is good to be aware of these just in case there is some reason you want to sabotage your game for…..reasons.

1: CLONE WARS!

Copy Flappy Bird or Angry Birds or any damn bird, they are almost any clones of these games. Personally I have a huge collection of identical Flappy bird clones and i love spending thousands of dollars on them on daily basis.

2: HIRE THE BEST AND CHEAPEST QA DEPARTMENT IN THE WORLD,YOU

Who knows better a game than its dev himself? Try it only until it's fun for you, only you. Avoid all areas that could cause bugs, it is possible that no one but the note probably say , there aren´t players who like to do stupid stuff just to troll the dev or break the game. If you can finish your game anyone can finish it .

3: MAKE YOUR GAMEPLAY AS COMPLICATED AS POSSIBLE.

People enjoy when they don’t understand the beginning of a game , they want to take minutes or even hours before performing the commands perfectly. Put as many buttons as you can on the UI, change commands all the time, use 2 sticks to aim and 3 buttons to make a simple shot, to achieve the highest realism.

4: TAKE YOUR TIME.

Take all the time in the world, especially if you are working with a team. Also, technology never changes, so it's easy to keep a lot of people concentrated in a project with little or no budget. Think for example of Duke Nukem Forever or Gun's and Roses album Chinese Democracy.

5: MAKE EXTENSIVE TUTORIALS

With so few options  on the market, the player of today can stop for hours to read calmly walls of text before starting to play. Make the characters talk to each other, giving as much detail as they can about the world and the story. Do not let the player discover anything by himself, he wants the characters or the tutorial to solve it for him.

6: TALK A LOT. YOU ARE THE REAL STAR, NOT YOUR GAME.

The best way to capture lots of attention is to constantly mention how much you know about video games or about an eternal project that you have 2, 3 or 6 years talking but you don´t have anything yet to show to the world , you are more interesting than your game so you keep repeating the same catchy pitch time after time. Also you keep counting how many followers you get on Twitter, everyday.

7: ALWAYS IMPROVISE FTW.

Planning is overrated, if you important eyes to watch your gameplay,  you use them all. Do not mind if you need to help out with some tasks at the /publishing)studio. about the extra time that this involves in development, or both will complicate your life to your colleagues if you're part of a team. Leave everything for the last minute. YOLO.

8: GO FOR THE MOST COMPLEX GAME YOU CAN POSSIBLY MAKE.

Especially if it's your first game or have little or no experience . Be a little ambitious and make a League of Legends or the next Destiny is a great option.

9: ALL THE WAY FOR THE FULLY 3D NEXT GEN EXPERIENCE!

Even the low-poly graphics 3D present a challenge, including the time to  or time to animate characters, texturize them , rigging, etc. Why not to have hyper detailed models? Total if each  you make it´s going to take to three months from start to finish , and the game needs 30 , only need ... damn, it´s going to need several years...

10: START AT THE FIRST LEVEL.

Usually the first level is the most complex, sometimes one typical mistake thinks that the learning curve in game design it´s getting complicated in the last levels as the game dynamics /skills of the character can get improvements, but the reality is that the first level of the game is usually the one who should catch you, it needs to be a great experience, needs to have something shocking, etc.... 

So, if it is the most important should you start it even when I have no experience in the rest of the game? I have all dynamic lists and even I'm getting used to generate a visual environment or environment? Of course. There is no better idea in games that start at the first level.

CONCLUSIONS.

If anybody is confused with the content of this list, let me clarify that it is merely sarcastic, so before sending death threats to me for the project you have destroyed and the careers a have broken, do the opposite of this list. Do not take this seriously, and make great games. Counting our time updating and developing the whole game, developing Flat Kingdom took us two years and three months from start to finish, if we would have read some of these advices before starting it, it’s for sure it would have been finished earlier.

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